Thank you for sharing your very short, very tight, very meaningful poem with me. Once again, and I’ve said this to everyone who has submitted a poem over the past weeks – don’t work so hard to rhyme your poem. I would rather be reading images that make me feel than reading lines that end in a rhyme. Rhyme has its place in poetry, but far more powerful and meaningful is the image (metaphor and simile) or a dramatic line break or alliteration (using the same letter sound over again – example: “She smiled slyly and seductively…”) I wonder if you would consider doing a bit of editing and then resubmitting. I think you have the beginnings of something I would like to share. Your friend in poetry, Susan
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