Home Forums Poetry Talk Simple, I write

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #17886
    __.ultraviolet._
    Participant

    It’s been an arithmetic cultivation though

    For a renowned seedling

    Similarity fades the moment, the tip flares

    Was it a delicacy that my muscles prompted to etch? 

    Every drop of nectar that is sweeter ever-more than I read

    How toxic rather a palanquin deprives

    Maa! You denied to query her baby , she’s born

    As maa, thou awakes all tiny heavy for her visit

    Just pricked up the enlarged cell of poetry to master them

    They stick a firm reason for the nip to go beyond a rampage

    And catch and catch – a falcon to be inside you

    Seems like evil owes to pay the way

    If not being sure, else make it true

    By making you the judge to the heart of judiciary

     

    I write, Yes not a good one instead a version of myself

    To salute every other authors trying to pedal and bloom!!!

    #18513
    Susan Katz
    Keymaster

    Thank you for sharing your poem with me.  There are some very good moments in your poem and you have managed to convey the strong feelings you have.  There is, for me, a bit of confusion with the language at times.

    They stick a firm reason for the nip to go beyond a rampage

    And catch and catch

    I am a bit confused by these lines and wonder if it might be a translation issue.  In any event, your poem is filled with passion and purpose and that, is the heart of poetry.  Your friend in poetry, Susan

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.