Home Forums Poetry Talk ETERNAL LOVE

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  • #18042
    astha
    Participant

    She was too young to understand, 

    the meaning of forever,

    but who would have known in between reading those lines,

    she’ll RISE IN LOVE, one day! 

     

    His charming persona captivated her eyes,

    maybe that was love at first sight. 

     

    Those butterflies in the stomach, 

    rosary blush on her cheeks,

    she knew the moment,

    this glitter is a gold,

    Not a flickering spree! 

     

    In real life,

    love stories doesn’t necessarily have a fairytale end.

    These two idiots never confessed! Those 3 magical spells!

     

    If she will meet him in this lifetime,

    She will say it aloud,

    How intact is all his beautiful vibes,

    Those wonderful smiles!

     

    She will tell him, 

    How she never ever cringed at her choice,

    How she doesn’t found his exact vibe. 

     

    She will tell him, 

    She knows LOVE,

    only because of him. 

     

    She will tell, she will tell him all, including those 3 magical spells!

    -By Astha

     

    #18732
    Susan Katz
    Keymaster

    How very romantic, and how sad, your poem is.  You have so much emotion and genuine feeling in your poem that we are compelled to experience your feelings.  That is what poetry should do – include the reader in the emotions of the poem.  There are, as you may know, some grammatical errors that interfere a little with the flow of the poem.  However, writing poetry, in a second language, is truly impressive.  Thank you so very much for sharing your work with me.  Your Friend in Poetry,

    Susan

    #18733
    astha
    Participant

    Thank you so much Susan for the appreciation and an honest feedback. I am an amateur writer, but yes I have taken your suggestion positively and modified my poem a bit. Thank you for your guidance!

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