Home Forums Poetry Talk The theology of dust

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  • #18154
    Comfort
    Participant

    I watch the sun spill itself thin through a cracked celling,

    Dust… a cathedral of forgotten memories

    dances with the desperate reminder

    that even ruins remember light.

    The air hums with small eternities,

    each particle rehearsing how to glow.

    I reach my hand into the beam,

    and it fits,perfectly,like time forgave me.

    Funny how the light never asks who built the cracks,

    it just arrives, certain it belongs.

     

    I wonder if God ever sneezed when He made us.

    If the first man was an accident of breath,

    a handful of earth flung too hard toward eternity.

    Every temple is dust pretending to be order.

    The air is a slow confession of beginnings,

    each mote a sermon on impermanence.

    Even silence sheds,

    every stillness has a shimmer if you look long enough.

     

    And yet, nothing keeps.

    Even light forgets the faces it touches.

    Dust gathers where faith once stood,

    patient, unashamed, unending.

    Perhaps holiness is just what lingers

    after everything else

    stops trying to be seen.

     

    #18873
    Susan Katz
    Keymaster

    Another powerful, intensely written poem.  Again, you have some outstanding lines – images and a fine, sustaining rhythm that keeps you moving effortlessly through the poem.  There are moments in the poem when I think less would have been more – for example:

    The air is a slow confession of beginnings, (Lovely)

    each mote a sermon on impermanence. (wonderful word choices)

    Even silence sheds,

    every stillness has a shimmer if you look long enough.  (don’t know if you need “if you look long enough.”)

    Poetry is “the fewest possible words, in the best possible order.”  Your poems are, unquestionably, poetry.  But poetry is a living thing and is always open to ways to improve itself.

    Again, thank you for trusting me with your poems – and for giving me such a powerful “punch” of poetry as I head off into the kitchen to do some holiday baking.

    Your friend in poetry,

    Susan

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