New reply from Susan Katz
<p>Wow! This is a potent poem – filled with so much raw emotion. While, you certainly have engaged me with your passion and honesty, I would, as a poet, wish for more in the way of imagery. You tell us what you're feeling (and felt) and in order for me to feel it too, become totally immersed in your poem, I need visual, sensory imagery. Also, I would suggest that "less is more" where poetry is concerned. Once you've said it, in the most powerfully poetic way possible, don't say it again – just assume we got it and feel it and know it! You have the sensitivity of a poet, the passion of a poet, and there are some very fine lines in your poem. I would suggest (and it is just a suggestion) that you go back to your poem and try editing out all that is repetitive and see if you can turn some of those lines into images that incorporate one or more of the five senses. Thank you so very much for trusting me to read and comment on your poem. Your friend in Poetry,</p>
<p>Susan</p>
https://poetladykatz.com/poetry-talk/dug-my-own-grave
Original Post by Riya Jaiswal
dug my own grave
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">If I'm a disappointment</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">give up on me then</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">let me cradle in the </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">arms of solitude</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">how does it even matter?</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">Wasn't i a human?</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">Or you took me literally</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">everytime I said</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">"I feel like an alien"</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">It's a lie if I say i cannot loathe</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">a lie, why? </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">learnt to reciprocate</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">your hostility.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;"> </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;"> </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">you weren't there </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">when you needed yourself?</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">You know why? </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">Because i was there</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">goddamn every time.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">It was never too much to ask</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">You say things which makes</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">less sense, blamed upon me</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">for losing my sanity?</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">eventually got infected</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">from your insensitivity.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;"> </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">I ripped myself </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">stood naked under</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">their peircing gaze</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">To safe thy skin </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">You know that, no? </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">Thence i knew</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">You were nothing </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">but coward</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">belittled me for showing valour</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">It were your fears, not mine.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">I despised you </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">For projecting them on me. </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">I loved you</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">For showing my worth.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;"> </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;"> </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">don't wander searching for</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">my leftovers buried in</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">that shallow corner</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">where you triumphed</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">leaving me in dirt</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">dissolved in soil, thanks</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">for astraying me home</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">- my origin</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">sometimes I dug my own grave</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">one day,i sat on my tombstone</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">renewed -to take off</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">you didn't destroy me</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em style="font-size: 1.4em;">but lost me for evermore. off</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>you didn't destroy me</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>but lost me for evermore.</em></p>