Reply To: New you

[Susan Katz]

Thank you for sending your poem my way.  You have some truly lovely images here –

“The Breeze whispering in your ears,

Like a soft feather on the skin”  

“Walk from the sidelines,

To the center of your life.”

“Your frozen heart needs to melt into

Tears of strength…”

What your poem needs now is some editing.  Read it and then reread it, read it aloud and try to find those words that get in the way of the rhythm of the poem, find the times where you have repeated the same thing – and pick the best way to say it just once.  You have written the beginnings of a very fine poem and I look forward to seeing it again after you’ve had a chance to work on it.  Might I suggest you check out some of my lessons here on the website, they may be helpful in the editing process – one, all poets need to learn and apply to their poems.  Thank you again for sharing, Susan