Home Forums Poetry Talk Glad: you found someone

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  • #17948
    Akanksha
    Participant

    Yeah! I misunderstood that
    You will be mine always
    If you don’t like me
    Than why are you so nice to me
    You know that i can’t even resist it
    Yeah! I misunderstood this
    You only mean to me
    But if you hate me
    I am glad with it
    You see my face
    Even tears roll down on it
    I will smile doesn’t matter
    Who you are in love with.

    #18591
    Susan Katz
    Keymaster

    Thank you for sharing your work with me.  I feel the emotion but I am “hearing” it – being told it – rather than having you show me, through imagery.  “Nice” as what – an image for “hate” – an image for “tears rolling down your face”…  You have all you need to create a very meaningful poem, just take the time to read a few contemporary poems and poets, and apply the techniques of poetry to your poem.  I would be happy to see it again, after you have had a chance to work on it.

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