Poet Lady Katz: new forum reply to Low-key

New reply from Susan Katz

<p>Very well written poem and, I thank you for submitting it for consideration for Featured Poem of the Month for December.  I particularly like your opening few lines, the way you've chosen your line breaks and some of the fine images you have used to invite us into your emotional world.  I am, however, wondering about the contradictory imagery – "sea of possibilities"  – to –  "untouched sparks/waiting to ignite…"  Somehow, they seem at odds with one another – and I think your poem would benefit from continuity of imagery.  Expand on your "sea" image and then, move on to your "ignite" image.  I do believe you have talent and I hope you will spend some time doing the work of the poet, and that is, editing.  Writing the poem, is the fun part – editing, is where the true work of the poet comes into play.</p>
<p>Your friend in poetry, Susan</p>

https://poetladykatz.com/poetry-talk/low-key

Original Post by Riya Jaiswal

Low-key

<p style="text-align: center;"><em>I feel lost in the</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>sea of possibilities,</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>seeing the wild</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>waves crawl upon me,</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>as I try to illuminate</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>my hollows into depth</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>of untouched sparks</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>waiting to ignite within.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>I collect the sea shells-</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>"What does it even mean?"</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>I decode, encrypt & decode.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>Is it love or hope?</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>I'll simply spring, crushing the</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>autumn leaves, trespassing</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>the road less trodden.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>I make typos and then</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>lace them into muses;</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>thousand cuts and a </em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>teardrop on my ukulele,</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>that's what I'm composed of-</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>a million ill spelt</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><em>metaphors and ink.</em></p>