forget-me-not

[Riya Jaiswal]

 

 

Forget me not
Forget me not as I try to put pieces together
or when I get lost in its jigsaw puzzle
trying to see the bigger picture.
No, don’t pull me out from the unknown island,
I still have to learn how to use my inbuilt compass.

Forget me not
I have to pursue love, create courage
to face the perils of life
to be able to stand eye to eye with its tempest.
No, don’t offer me your hand yet-
I need to first see my shadows
heal the wounds and redefine the scars.

Forget me not
as I try to mend my path
amidst the chaos and devils.
No, don’t shout my name yet-
I still have to know my purpose
being here on stage.
I’m that namless generation
with fake enthusiasm in a hope
I’ll make it there soon,
by that time, forget me not.

Forget me not
Remember me in every flaws I made,
in those attempts of
not leaving any stones unturned.
No, don’t stop admiring that grin
remember me when
I poured salts from my eyes
and lied transfixed in your lap.
I hope you forget me not as
I’m still learning to subside my rage.

Forget me not-
see it as an reasonable request,
there’s still half way left, up the hill.
Please don’t go,
I’m about to conquer my demons
I’ll hug you again, soon.
No, don’t call me victorious
I’m re-evaluating this new found glory
meanwhile forget me not.
Forget me not.

[Susan Katz]

Many thanks for sharing this very personal and purposeful poem with me.  I can feel, as I read it, the intense emotion that suggests your deep personal connection to the words and feelings you are sharing with your reader.

“I need to first see my shadows
heal the wounds and redefine the scars.”  

This is a very powerful line.  If I may, I would suggest you tighten it a bit by compacting it into only those words that are necessary. /-indicates line break suggestions. “I need first see/ my shadows heal/ the wound redefining/ scars…”  A number of your lines could be more meaningful if they were compacted down into only those words that are necessary to get your meaning, and your feelings, across to your reader.  Poetry is:  The fewest words, in the best possible order.”

You have a very fine poem here and I will consider it for Featured Poem of the Month for December.”  Thank you again for sharing it with me.  Your friend in poetry, Susan

[Riya Jaiswal]

Thank you so much for the feature and your feedback is very meaningful to me. It has encouraged me to write more and share on this lovely platform.

[Author]

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