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This is a place to “talk” poetry with someone who has loved it all her life. I have a true passion for the possibilities of poetry and would love to hear your thoughts and/or read your poem. I will be happy to offer my reaction to your work and, based on over 40 years of teaching poetry, organizing, and conducting poetry workshops, working as a book review editor for an international poetry magazine, authoring five books of poetry and two textbooks on teaching poetry, send along my thoughts on ways to make your poem stronger and more impactful.

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Your friend in poetry, Susan

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Anew, yet in doom! (1 reply)

2 years ago
RG983 2 years ago

Anew, yet in doom!

Pious patina of life’s passion,

In shades of worries & wonders;

Finds fullness, in nature’s casket,

Kissing the crest, heaven anigh.

Am that gale of monsoon, O greeting golden grains,

In the camouflage of dazzle, from camellia to camomile;

Smearing fragrance exotic, or colours decked bright,

Painting thoughts in this clouds, as if an artist were I.

In the bosom of mine bower, blushes cherries as red wine,

& robins, in disguise, art announcing endless love;

From thickets, even hosting lil’ cicadas at choir,

Inking tales, am immersed, in divine idle pleasure.

Vagabond in the vales, I indulge in brewing beauty

Luring mine soul with the bird of paradise;

In iris, I imbibe idyllic passion,

Imitating the tale of immortal insight.

Beyond flaws, beyond doubts, beyond spheres of existence-

Inebriated mine soul, by shades of wondrous horizon;

Which fountain the fashion of unfathomable creation,

Letting dive into the blossoms, anew yet in doom.







Susan Katz
2 years ago
Susan Katz 2 years ago

Thank you for sending.  There are some beautiful moments in your poem.  You have used alliteration - almost to perfection, in some instances.  "In the camouflage of dazzle, from camellia to camomile;"  "Pious patina of life’s passion, / In shades of worries & wonders;"

I am truly impressed with the way you articulate your way through the poem - English I presume, is a second language - and yet, you manage to use it very well to express yourself through the art of poetry.  There are some moments when I stumble over the wording but, having said that, your poem is really very, very good.  I will definitely consider it for the week of March 4th when my theme (and now you know before anyone else) will be "The Moods of March."  I am very impressed with your poetic skills. 

May I suggest you go through your poem and look for moments when the poem could be edited a bit - taking out a word here or there and, checking the grammatical implications of words and word combinations.  A poem is always a work in progress.

Thank you so much for sharing, Susan




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