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I speak truth & I'm hated (1 reply)

Riya Jaiswal
3 months ago
Riya Jaiswal 3 months ago

I count my mouth ulcers which

multiplies everytime the

truth is not spoken

my emotions are there to vent

not a topic for you to debate

i speak truth

for which I'm hated

I don't speak at all

for which I'm hated

I hide the truth

for which I'm hated.

I'm awed, do you posses

warehouses full of hatred?

or a heirloom you inherited?

 

 

cease asking me to say

when you aren't all ears

cease asking me to stay

when you are always leaving

you'd shout at me for being mute

What pleasure thou

get from noise?

I'm not your doll

I'll wail if you'd ask me 

to halt crying

been rebelling all my life

From people like you 

From people like me

Who allowed you to 

Point at my choices

It's not my problem, but yours amour

What qualifies you 

to deserve my kindness?

 

Susan Katz
3 months ago
Susan Katz 3 months ago

Once again, you have filled the page with powerful emotion and a raw kind of honesty that is both touching and compelling.  The poem has a very fine rhythm, as well.  I'm a little turned off by the word "thou" thinking "you" would work just as well and not stand out in a kind of confusing way - since your poem is not written in an old English format.  Also, I find "amour" a bit jarring - as it seems, as a reader coming to your poem with no background into your relationship, out of place.  You certainly have all the instincts of a poet!  - Susan

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