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Your friend in poetry, Susan

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Our last song (1 reply)

Riya Jaiswal
1 year ago
Riya Jaiswal 1 year ago
that day you called me your home

only not to care to return abode
 
we talked of signs
how soulmates are 
not found but made
how fate is not something 
which is destined to be
rather it lies in our choices
 
when we talked of sense
we lost our mind
so called it philosophy of life
drunken on midnight romance 
 
you were the soundhole
in our guitar below my strings 
whenever i played the notes
calling you my muse
you proved me wrong 
as my picks kept falling 
in your hollow space 
and you kept forgetting
what lyric was next
 
so we decided to end the show
and get happily friend zoned
 
but here i am
humming the old chords
strumming in your thoughts
writing about our last song
whose melody sings 
along the sunken rhythm of my heart
 
     "you're still a selenophile
     but I'm no longer your moon"
 
Susan Katz
1 year ago
Susan Katz 1 year ago

Thank you so much for sharing your poetry with me.  I will respond to each poem, individually.  There are some lovely moments in this poem and, the intensity of your message shines through.  Just a couple of things to consider... in poetry, "less is more" and, simple words seem to work better than "grand" ones.  Having said that, I feel the emotion and I am moved by your words.  - Susan

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