Poet Lady Katz: new forum reply to Autumn.

New reply from Susan Katz

Thank you for sharing another poem with me. You have some lovely lines here and there is a quiet and harmonious rhythm that seems to fit the poem very well. There are a few grammatical errors, that simply don't translate well into English – for example: "tranquil" should be tranquility – "Falling do" should be falling does – "The skies" should be singular – sky and "are" should be is – "jealous" should be jealousy – You don't need "with" the waltzing wings (which by the way is a lovely image) – "in" her own way – should be on her own way – "Separating" should be separated – "To set her off "on" a new journey.
There is much to commend in this poem – you have a true sense of imagery and that brings the poem, your words and thoughts, to life in a sensory way. I will be featuring your poem from last week, in next week's posts so, if you have an Instagram tag or Facebook tag you would like us to use, please send it along. I'm afraid this poem, will have to wait for fall – though you should be very proud of your effort – it is truly well and thoughtfully written. – Susan

https://poetladykatz.com/poetry-talk/autumn

Original Post by Tiny glowing star

Autumn.

AUTUMN- A NEW BEGINING!
 
The trees are so excited,
Blowing the leaves in a waltz,
They look like they are dying by falling,
But it is a begining to their new journey!
 
They are bound to the tree,
A new tranquil to ease the minds,
Even if they suddenly change their way,
To a far away land, they take a nap beside a singing lake!
 
Falling do not mean failing,
It paves a way to a new adventure,
To explore in their fluterring youth,
A stroll to mingle with foe and friends!
 
The skies are so wide,
That it stares at the falling leaves,
In jealous and bewilderment from afar,
Unable to join with the waltzing wings!
 
There she goes in her own way,
Separating from her honest friend,
Who had spent his life guarding her,
To set her off in a new journey!
- Swetha.