[georgia_pearl]

I considered your suggestions and made some changes… I’m not familiar with some of the techniques or the reasoning behind them, but I want to learn more! Thanks so much for your time and help!! I’m so excited you would consider this one for a feature! Here it is again:

Dreams

a part of living
fantasy fused with reality
thoughts igniting reverie forming
imagery in my mind
they make ordinary things
shine I look in wonder
and put pen to paper
illuminating
colorful, vanishing vapors slipping
away on a string
of dreams…

[georgia_pearl]

Ok.. Thanks so much for your encouragement!! 😊

[georgia_pearl]

I think I made the changes you recommended. Is this what you meant?

Love is the Aftermath of Storm

Love is
You holding me tight after my tears have abated
The sky stops crying and the wind stops
When the earth is moist and green
It’s silence softly soothing the stricken scene
It needs no words to heal the heart
Love is the aftermath of the storm

Thanks so much for your feedback! I’ll continue to work on the things you mentioned.

[georgia_pearl]

Also for clarification, I chose the name “ You’re a Beach” because the poem used images from list of things that make a beach, and not just an ocean. ☺️ So I was thinking of a beach as everything that makes up a beach (ocean, sand, sun etc) and not just the strip of sand.

[georgia_pearl]

Thank you so much for sharing your comments with me and the thoughtfulness you put into it! You made some very good points that I will definitely work on.. I would be interested in the lessons though I couldn’t get the link you posted to work for me. I did see the other “lessons” section though. Thank you for your time and suggestions!

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