[Susan Katz]

Thank you so much for sharing your poem with me.  I very much like the images and the way you maintain the vision of a “pitstop” throughout the poem.  It works!  I will be featuring you poem one day this week on my Instagram post – so, stay tuned.  Your friend in poetry, Susa

[Susan Katz]

What an interesting poem and it certainly packs a punch. I’m not sure I understand the meaning completely, but then – perhaps I wasn’t meant to.  I am impressed with your brevity and how much emotion and power you managed to incorporate in four short lines.  Well done.  I will definitely be considering your work to be featured in one my Instagram posts in the next two weeks.  Your friend in poetry, Susan

[Susan Katz]

Well done!  I’m a slight bit confused by the lines “the more I feel, The more I starve!”  I’m having difficulty connecting “feel” and “starve” but, “I drank the darkness with the stars… My bones are all that’s left with me” is strong and well written.  I wonder if the word is “of me” rather than “with me” but perhaps you have a meaningful reason for your choice of words.  I will definitely consider your work for featuring in one of my Instagram posts over the next two weeks.  Thank you so much for sharing, Susan

[Susan Katz]

Thank you very much for sharing this very rhythmic poem.  I very much liked “life disguised as ocean, or / ocean disguised as life.”  You might want to think about your line break and see if there is a way to make your ending even more dramatic and meaningful.  All best, Susan

[Susan Katz]

What a very personal and emotionally touching poem.  One can feel the love and comfort and the very special relationship between mother and child.  I thank you for sharing your work with me.  Your friend in poetry, Susan

[Susan Katz]

Lovely and exactly what I was hoping for.  A “word picture” in just two lines.  Thank you so very much for participating and sharing.  I will be featuring your poem in one of my Instagram posts in the next couple of weeks.  All best, Susan

[Susan Katz]

Well done!  I really like your opening line “His departure was like thunder in the dark sky…”  We feel the pain, the dread of what’s to come – one little line says so much.  “her broken heart pieces…” is also quite nice and fits in well to the coming of “the rain and storm.”  Thank you so much for sharing.  I will definitely feature your poem, one day in the next week or so, on my poetladykatz Instagram page.  I look forward to reading more of your work.  – Susan

[Susan Katz]

What a very emotional poem.  It is so personal and painful, it is almost hard to read.  I wonder, from a poetic point of view, if you could find a way to say all of this in fewer lines, using imagery.  I believe you have a poem here, one that needs to be written, it just needs some poetic techniques applied – imagery (metaphor and simile) rhythm, alliteration, rhyme if you so desire – and a tightening of the lines so that they become a fist, not an open hand.  Thank you so much for sharing,  I was genuinely touched and moved by your words.  – Susan

[Susan Katz]

Well done.  Short, crisp and to the point and, poetic.  I am delighted you shared your work with me and will be featuring it in a poetladykatz Instagram post in the next week or so.  Keep on writing!  – Susan

[Susan Katz]

Absolutely lovely, meaningful, and beautifully written and conceived.  You have managed in just a very few words to say so much and make us, the reader, feel so much.  Thank you for sharing.  I will definitely be featuring your poem in one of my poetladykatz Instagram posts next week.  You are a poet!  – Susan

[Susan Katz]

Thank you so very much for sharing your thoughts about writing in the form of this very emotional and introspective poem.  Poets, I think, give themselves something just by writing, by exposing themselves and their feelings through the art of poetry.  I am so pleased you find so much joy in writing.  I do too!  – Susan

[Susan Katz]

Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, in the form of poetry, on why you write.  We are all driven to write by something within and I can feel the passion and the drive you are feeling – the compulsion to write poetry.  You have some fine lines in your poem – “It’s a sync of feelings carved in a frame of words…”  but, if I may say, you rely a bit too much on rhyme.  It is a common problem most poets have at one time or another and is easily addressed by using images (metaphors and similes) and by allowing the rhythm of the words to guide you, not that they rhyme at the end of a line.  Keep on writing – you have the passion and you have the need, and I look forward to seeing your work in the future.  -Susan

[Susan Katz]

Thank you so much for sharing your poem with me.  You have a wealth of emotion in your poem and I can feel the joyful ending.  I would like to suggest that you rely less on rhyme and try to find images (metaphors and similes) for your emotions.  Rhyme has its place in poetry, but it shouldn’t dictate how the poem is written, the rhythm of the poem or perhaps most importantly, the message of the poem.  I do believe you have the promise of a fine poem here, it just needs, what all writers must adjust to, editing.  I would also like to suggest you read some contemporary poets to get a better feel for how poetry looks on the page and sounds to the ear.  Once again, thank you for engaging with poetladykatz.com  – Susan

[Susan Katz]

Very often, when I find myself needing to write but unable to, I start reading a book of poetry – usually one of my favorites.  So, your poem resonated with me and I thought it very well written.  I particularly liked “I might learn to carry the wonders I am not…” and “They have mastered the new tricks when I don’t even know the old…”  There is a certain intensity in your poem and self reflection which, I think, will touch those who read your poem and those, especially, who write poetry.  I think your poem would benefit from editing, tightening the lines, getting rid of unnecessary words – but, overall, good poem.  Thank you so much for sharing it with me,  Susan

[Susan Katz]

How lovely that you sent your thoughts about why you write poetry, in the form of poetry.  And, your words ring true and your poem has a lovely cadence to it.  You have, if I may say, a word that I am struggling with.  “I write because I have lost ‘somewhere.'”  Did you mean “somewhere” or did you mean “something.”  Please let me know because I may want to feature your response later in the week on Instagram and here on my site.  Thank you so very much for sharing your thoughts and meaningful poem with me.  – Susan

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